Photo of Alyvia and her family used with permission from Amanda Eaton Photography
Dear Alyvia, it is a strange irony–isn’t it?–that holidays are the happiest days for some and the saddest days for others. I imagine this Mother’s Day has been both for you, and so I wrote you a poem. Bear with me. My poem writing skills are dusty. (Think Secret Garden lock-it-up-and-throw-away-the-key condition.)
As girls we played and we dreamed
On the merry-go-round by your place.
Round it went and loud we laughed
With the wind and the sun on our face.
Nothing was hard or frightening then.
We thought little of grace.
The houses now have changed. And the park?
And the dreams that we were dreaming?
I remember the best one–
We would be moms. This was our scheming.
Round we went and loud we laughed–
The start of our teaming.
You have lost more than most lose in life–
Your mom, your twins, your girl, (and your will?)
Any last innocence gone–
I cried ’til it hurt, denying until
Round I went and loud I questioned–
Claudie was perfect, born still?
I hope we’ll grow old as friends.
As we age and our life inverts.
We’ve shared too much to this point–
The knitting of hearts over hurts,
The sharing of dreams and days.
Round we’ll go in fits and spurts.
Now we know only of grace.
After enduring an unbelievable year (No, really. You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.), Alyvia has set up a blog and project to honor the precious little girl she lost. Please consider checking out her page and contributing a random act of kindness.
Mamas, we need each other.